Most likely your friend is experiencing dispair and hopelessness. This economy is enough to make many people lose faith in ever having a normal career. I am sure he is simply embarrassed and feeling so ashamed he can’t bring himself to talk to you. As far as buying a computer, you know it takes money to make money and without a computer he probably had no hope of ever developing an income to pay you back. Having a computer is critical in this day and age. It’s not like one can buy a reconditioned computer that wouldn’t break down quickly or become out of date within a year. Buying an old computer is just plain not smart if one has aspirations to make a living online.
Don’t allow your wife’s second guessing and her lack of forgiveness to affect you. All of that is called “materialism” and it is just as bad if not worse than your friend’s shortcomings.
Treat others as you would have them treat you! Someday the shoe may be on the other foot!
Your character was tested and you passed with flying colors. Your heart is pure and without guilt. Too bad one can’t say the same for your wife. Maybe you can explain to her that harboring resentment is harmful to one’s soul.

i lost two friends this way, though i managed to get the nearly 2000 bucks that i had loaned them (in total) back. what was galling was that both of them were earning (and spending) more than me but did not care to repay my 0% interest loan. i’ve learned my lesson … and i trust you have too!

- s.b.

As I said that I was not too upset about the money loss to my friend. But the two things that upset me somewhat at the end was that my friend could have save me $1800 tax dollar (my marginal bracket) without any “financial loss” to him, but he simply didn’t help out. And also, I feel that one of his key personal problem with everything was that he simply doesn’t FACE the problem, but rather AVOID the problem.

Very unfortunately for him, at the end, he chose the same method of facing our friendship, which I doubt that he could find it elsewhere for more.

Obviously for my wife, she is not so thrilled about this friend. I personally don’t try to judge my friend. And I simply wish the best for my friend at this point. He would need lots of luck, but he kept forgetting that bad luck is not the excuse for going down, but just a test on the character.

You based you decision on heart, on kindness, on humanity.

You did right.

Your friend likely suffers from lack of something. Maybe even depression. Regardless, he doesn’t have what you have. Not yet. And can learn from you.

Hopefully he will see his flaws eventually in his future. And will realize his mistakes.

And, the greatest thing – it’ll be because of your kindness.

Again, you did it all right.

You’re alright.

I think it’s amazing how generous in spirit you are, not to get angry that your friend obviously didn’t value or respect your friendship much. I’m guessing your wife is more upset about that than the loss of the money. I know I would be if someone treated my husband that way!

As Moom said consider it a gift.

I give money to friends not loan. When you loan money it makes the friendship awkward.

Sometimes, people get caught up in the cost/value of things and forget that having someone who can lend a hand without asking for anything in return is an amazing gift. Its like having my mother or father ask me for a loan. I would gladly give them the money with out question or need for repayment.

Some argue that our peer groups pull us up or down. That might be true on average, but it says nothing about the particular person.